Self-improvement is a very socially conditioned ideology in Western society that we like to think will make us happy — but it really doesn’t. You can’t improve who you fundamentally are. You can only accept yourself and all of your internal beauty and move forward with that knowing in life. Chasing external things (relationships, validation, love, the “need to improve”) will not bring you true fulfillment. Because it really does come from within.
Try to not judge yourself so hard. Realize that you are a fundamentally whole being as you are and there is absolutely nothing that needs to be improved about “you”. Let that knowing shine through and life will do what it’s supposed to.
You can develop skills through discipline, and get better at things. But you can’t improve “you” at the core level, so just give up on trying.
When you do come to understand this (and you will know when the time comes) you won’t feel the need to improve who you are. You will do the things you want to do in life and it won’t feel so heavy and forced.
Remember, you’re a whole being as you are. All you need to do is realize this — and go on with your life!
Imagine if you were given two scoops of the same food, along with a big bowl of water, every day, for the rest of your life. And to make matters more frustrating, you couldn’t leave the house until someone let you–you were 100% dependent on your owners to do anything other than sleep all day…and watch them eat whatever they want and do as they please.
Wouldn’t you feel controlled? Wouldn’t you instinctively rebel to try to reclaim your freedom?
We can apply this analogy to our lives as well. We are all unique individuals and should go about our lives pursuing our passions and utilizing our talents to the highest degree. We should do this in the purest form of joy and happiness to be alive. Sometimes we get so caught up in the system; we feel compelled to follow orders and do as we are told. We believe that is our only way to be successful, otherwise we’re hopeless. Our potential is limited because someone told us to follow their model, not yours. Someone else’s (more powerful) will is controlling ours.
Imagine again you are that dog with shitty caregivers that walk over you. All you want to do is run off into the wild and be free. However, you no longer have a guarantee of anything. Nothing is predictable or entirely safe, but it’s not mundane anymore. You’re doing exactly what you always wanted to do and you’re paving your own path to greatness.
Are you willing to give up on everything that doesn’t 100% matter to you or enrich your life, ditch those surface level “friends”, and take a leap of faith – for the sake of doing what you love? This is the hardest step for everyone. It IS risky and people don’t like uncertainty. We want guarantees, tips and tactics. Because we might fail. In fact, we will. But we might succeed. We can learn an incredible amount of lessons along the way and become stronger and wiser individuals every day. All while doing what we wholly love and care about.
I hope you will take the plunge, break out of the mold, and blossom into the unique person you have always meant to be. The ice is thin, but the other side of the river is calling you to your greatness.
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